July 2012
Best Author-on-Author Insults in History
Virginia Woolf on James Joyce: [Ulysses is] the work of a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.
Harold Bloom on J.K. Rowling: How to read ‘Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone’? Why, very quickly, to begin with, and perhaps also to make an end. Why read it? Presumably, if you cannot be persuaded to read anything better, Rowling will have to do.
H. G. Wells on George Bernard Shaw: An idiot child screaming in a hospital.
Ralph Waldo Emerson on Jane Austen: Miss Austen’s novels . . . seem to me vulgar in tone, sterile in artistic invention, imprisoned in the wretched conventions of English society, without genius, wit, or knowledge of the world.
William Faulkner on Ernest Hemingway: He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.
Ernest Hemingway on William Faulkner: Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?
W. H. Auden on Robert Browning: I don’t think Robert Browning was very good in bed. His wife probably didn’t care for him very much. He snored and had fantasies about twelve-year-old girls.
Mark Twain on Jane Austen: Every time I read ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone.
June 2012
necrolust:
i brought these gifts 4 u they’re up in my bummmmmm
gosh why did 7th grade me think it was a good idea to like every single facebook page that even slightly applied to me
plot twist: 5 years later she never sees sk8er boi on MTV because MTV doesn't play music.
GOOBY PLS
me: i am so bored
unfinished video games: play me
unfinished books: read me
unfinished tv shows and unwatched movies: watch me
daily exercise routine: complete me
me: there's nothing to do
Curse of the Fandoms
Doctor Who Fandom Curse: Knowing that at some point your Doctor will have to regenerate.
Supernatural Fandom Curse: Knowing that your Series will end.... and soon.
Avengers Fandom Curse: Knowing that Joss Whedon will likely kill a favorite character.
Twilight Fandom Curse: Knowing that you will never win a fight against another fandom.... ever.
Harry Potter Fandom Curse: Knowing that it will never be as good as the first time around.
Sherlock Fandom Curse: Knowing that after waiting forever you will probably only get three more episodes with a cliff hanger even worse than the previous one.
Glee Fandom Curse: The show
LOTR Fandom Curse: Lying abandoned and forgotten in a dark pit of Tumblr while waiting ten years for The Hobbit.
Hunger Games Fandom Curse: Knowing that your favorite character will either die, go insane, or never be seen again
Game of Thrones Fandom Curse: Knowing that every one will die. That's it. Everyone dies.
